Hot Dog Haiku

Beef pork or chicken
Academics are worthless
Good hot dogs don’t care

Hot Dog Haiku

Warm and soft is right
Life is cold and unbending
Buns should be better

Hot Dog Haiku

Paper or foil
Enhances hot dog spirit
Foam coffins bring death

Hot Dog Haiku

North Central folks say
Slaw is wrong and we know best
Foolish heads in sand

Hot Dog Haiku

Mustard chili slaw
Onions may be omitted
This is the true way

Hot Dog Haiku

West Virginia
Chili slaw mustard onions
The one true hot dog

Hot Dog Haiku

The people forget

Haiku hot dog blogging starts
Again people think

Charleston HDJ Review - Five Corners Cafe

In a location that formerly housed another HDJ (see review of Neighbormart here), Five Corners Cafe had a leg up on life simply by association Neighbormart had great hot dogs and if not for the intervention of the West Virginia Tax Department would no doubt be still serving them today. While it offends me to believe this I think I know that it is true: when you don't pay your taxes the state is glad to help facilitate change without regard to how good your hot dogs are. Sad.

Especially sad in this case because this change was NOT for the better, at least when it comes to hot dogs.

Spurred by this Daily Mail story about the new restaurant and buoyed by the hope that a staff of five of with 150 years of restaurant experience would have to make good hot dogs, I made my way over the Five Corners. Riding this wave of optimism, I forked over way too much money for 2 hot dogs ($2.39 each) and waited in glorious expectation for them to arrive. I waited, and waited and waited. 25 minutes later my two hot dogs arrived. And the chili had beans in it.

That sound you hear is the sad deflation of my formerly high expectations of getting good hot dogs.

Not only did the chili have beans, the slaw was tasteless. The bun was grilled unnecessarily and the weenie was charred from over grilling.

Perhaps the rest of the menu is better at Five Corners Cafe, but you only get one shot at a WVHotDogs.com. Fail. 1 Weenie. And that's generous.

Grafton HDJ Review - T&L Hot Dogs

While it is not necessarily a 100% guarantee, you can usually take it to the bank that you will not get much variation between T&L Hot Dog outlets in terms of quality and consistency. While there are some T&L outlets that rise above the norm (see this review of the Clarksburg / Old Bridgeport Hill location), the majority do not deviate away from the formula that the chain has become know for. This is the case with the T&L located on the outskirts of Grafton.

The Grafton location is not necessarily in Grafton proper, but is actually situated between Pruntytown and Bridgeport at the junction of U.S. routes 50 and 250. This location is also annexed on one side by a banquet hall. There is no heavy population center immediately nearby, but this location has thrived and survived due to the heavy traffic flow from the aforementioned highways. The interior is warm and pleasing, featuring wood paneling throughout. Additionally, it is large enough to hold a good size crowd, yet spacious enough to allow one stretch out with plenty of room.

Like other T&L locations in the area, the motif is largely centered around 50's and 60's memorabilia. I noticed that all of the archived newspapers that were framed on the walls seemed to focus on rather morbid historical events: Pearl Harbor, the death of Elvis, John Lennon's murder, the assassination of John F. Kennedy, and the passing of FDR. Needless to say that made for some rather curious lunchtime reading.

As for the hot dogs themselves, I previously mentioned that the song remains the same here. As always, T&L delivered some of the best hot dog chili around, a rich meaty taste with a pleasing consistency. I ordered the medium chili this time out and found it to be warm in the tummy and pleasing to the palate. The slaw had a nice contrast of sweet and tang, but honestly didn't taste a fresh as I usually get from some of the other locations. This was a bit of a let down. Also, I thought the weenie was cooked to the bare minimum requirement. My serving seemed to be cooked to an adequate temperature, but lacked some plumpness. Overall, I thought the entire offering was good but not necessarily great.

All in all, the Grafton T&L Hot Dogs rate four weenies. While their formula for chili is usually spot-on, the slaw and weenie had a little room for improvement. The location is a little out of the way for most, but if you're in the neighborhood you will no doubt find a WVHD that fits the bill for your craving.

Oscar Mayer Weinermobile in Ripley today

The Weienrmobile will be in Ripley today. If you are a hot dog fan, or even just want to see a piece of  classic Americana up close and personal, check it out at the local supermarket at 200 Academy Drive from 10am - 4pm.

Here is a report I did a few years ago whe it last appeared in the area. Sorry the picture links are broken.

Weeniemobile

The famous Oscar Mayer Weeniemobile is at the Southridge Walmart right now!

Nitro HDJ Review - Linda's Hot Diggity Dogs

Linda's Hot Diggity Dogs occupies a space inside the Brandywine Flea Market in Nitro that was formerly occupied by Jake's Dawg House (you can read that review from 2008 here). Recently Linda, presumably the owner, has posted on our Facebook page and asked for a re-review. This past weekend afforded the time to make the trip to Nitro to check it out.

Proudly written on the menu board in first position is "WV Hot Dog" but its toppings weren't listed. When I inquired as to what "everything" consisted of ketchup was unfortunately included in the list, so I asked for two without the offensive tomato stew.

The first thing I noticed about these hot dogs was the yellowish tint to the slaw. Not quite Marmet Yellow Slaw yellow, but definitely yellowish. This brought a rise of hope within my hungry breast since I had never had yellow slaw that wasn't very tasty. But when I picked up my hot dog I was disappointed to feel the stiffness of a cold bun. Not a good sign.

Aside from the bun, though, it went pretty well. The yellowish slaw was very good (sweet and creamy) and the chili was about average (very meaty but having not much spice or complexity). At the center was a nicely grilled weenie that tasted like one of the more premium brands.

 Overall this was a good hot dog and earns a solid 3.5 Weenie score. A steamed bun and something distinct about the chili would have leveraged the quality of the slaw into a higher score.

Racist City Planners Conspire to Close Downtown Charleston Hot Dog Joint

"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing." Edmund Burke

For years the Middle East Mart has been providing those who frequent Slack Plaza and the KRT Transit Mall with the necessities of life: Cigarettes, Pepsi and Hummus. When they added hot dogs to their menu several years ago the hordes of people that this addition brought to the area began to cause some problems for City leaders. Two years ago the mayor installed "loafer rails" - strips of steel spikes - on top of the planter seatwalls that were meant to discourage the hard working Slack Plaza regulars from sitting down and eating their lunch. Then last summer he had the trees in the plaza cut down to eliminate shady areas where people could sip their sodas in the heat of summer. While these tactics have no doubt had a negative effect on the hot dog sales at Middle East Mart, WVHotDogs.com has remained silent while this administration has systematically persecuted the only minority owned Hot Dog Joint in the downtown area. Recent events, however, have made it impossible for us to remain silent any longer.  

This week a group of "experts" from a university in North Central West Virginia (where, as we all know, many people have a sick aversion to cole slaw on hot dogs) came to Charleston to hold a "community meeting" where a "plan" for "improvement" of Slack Plaza was "developed." Funny, but only two days after this meeting was held, a plan was released whose major component is the removal of Middle East Mart from the plaza. No other business would be affected by this proposal; only the one that is owned by people from the Middle East was targeted. Has there ever been a more obvious case of racial profiling? Can we, the hot dog loving citizens of West Virginia, stand idly by while a Capital City HDJ is run out of town by a racist administration?

Call To Action

Here's what I propose: Today, anyone who works or is visiting in Downtown Charleston needs to go to Middle East Mart and buy a hot dog! Whether you opt for one of their regular hot dogs with grape leaf slaw or one of the more exotic ones (I recommend the all-lamb weenie with baba ganoush on a pita), join us in standing up for the rights of our Muslim brothers, won't you?

Make sure you do it today. Tomorrow the opportunity will be lost. All great revolutions begin on a significant date: Communism has its May Day; perhaps April 1 will henceforth be as well known.

I have a dream today.

WBOY TV Visits The Custard Stand

Tonight's edition of the evening news on WBOY TV featured The Custard Stand in Webster Springs on the semi-regular "Restaurant Road Trip". Hopefully the accompanying video will be posted soon. You can read the text from the report at this link. Of particular interest is that Custard Stand is looking to expand by offering franchise opportunities.

If you want to read some more heartfelt reviews, check out Stanton's review from August 2010 here, or my review of the Flatwood's location here.

Sam's Casino Hot Dogs

I have noticed a trend, disturbing for me, for Sam's Hot Dog Stand locations being opened as part of a gambling parlor. Malden and Marmet were the first two such places but a new one has opened on Greenbrier Street in Charleston. I'm not sure if these are hot dog joints that have gambling rooms attached or gambling parlors that offer hot dogs to their addicts, I mean customers. Is this a new corporate direction for Sam's? Does anyone care?

A nifty hot dog iPhone game free today in the App Store

App Advice reports that Crazy Hotdogs is free for today only (3/26/11) in the Apple App Store. It is a fun little game that allows you to manage your own hot dog joint from your iPhone or iPod Touch.

My only complaint: no slaw!

Still, the price is right and it should help the time pass while waiting for two WV hot dogs & crinkle-cut fries at your favorite weenie stand.

Click here to download.

Clarksburg HDJ Review - Stealey Lunch

For the longest time, it seemed as though the hot dog culture in the greater Clarksburg area had reached a level of complacency. There hadn't been any new pure or worthwhile hot dog joints of note in some time. There wasn't much to write about for the longest time, and to be honest the weather and my work schedule weren't very cooperative.

I was a really disappointed to find that one of the better HDJs in the area, Hometown Hot Dogs of Clarksburg, had shut it's doors in the latter part of last year. The building that once housed some WVHD greatness had fallen into "good hands" for selling insurance, if you get my drift. However, I was suprised to find out that the crew from Hometown had actually packed up and moved to the other side of town, smack dab between the East View section of Clarksburg and Anmoore. The new name was Smiley's Hot Dogs, and all seemed right with the world. The slaw was fresher than ever, the service was great, and the chili was hearty as ever. But alas, it was a short-lived comeback. By the time I had started to pen a review of the new digs, Smiley's shuttered it's doors sometime before Christmas of 2010. Personally, I'd chalk it up to a very poor location.

So as I looked and looked around Clarksburg some more. Surely I had not covered all of the good HDJs around, had I? Luckily, I found Stealey Lunch. Just a few blocks down from where the old Hometown Hot Dogs stood was this inviting new establishment nestled in the corner of a building along one of the busier thoroughfares in town.

Stealey Lunch had a crisp, clean interior with lots of space. There wasn't much in the way of atmosphere or decor, but nonetheless the smells of deliciousness permeated the walls to make one forget this negligible "shortcoming" (if you want to even call it that). The menu features a multitude of choices for lunch, ranging from hot dogs, sandwiches, chicken, salads, and the like.

The hot dogs are listed as "slaw dogs", but they do come as a West Virginia hot dog should by the numbers (you know the routine...chili, slaw, onions, mustard). But to say that these hot dogs meet the standards for quality. For starters, the weenie was incredible scrawny. Cook it one minute too long, and it could've been a toothpick. The chili had hint of "tomatoey" to it, which surprisingly was the only highlight of it. There wasn't anything wrong with the chili, mind you. It just was devoid of any other real flavor. The slaw was also in the "okay" category, unfortunately. This iteration of slaw included hints of carrots for some reason. Carrots are okay, but when used as a hot dog topping they are best left off. My final beef was with the bun. It tasted as though a stale bun had been warmed over (badly). After a few minutes of cooling off, the bun became chewy, which is never a good sign.

While I'm always glad to see hot dog joints make their home in the north central area, I still find myself disappointed by the effort put in to the product. Stealey Lunch seems to "want" to put out a good hot dog, but doesn't have the goods to "execute". I'd like to say the potential is there, but who knows? Maybe some simple tweaking will liven up these otherwise boring dogs, but until then I have to give these a 3 weenie rating (and I'm spotting them about 1/2 weenie here).

Charleston Area HDJ Re-Review - Venture Family Fun Center

I just realized that this blog is now 5 years old. The anniversay passed in early January without fanfare.

Huh.

Anyway, the reason I realized this is because today I had hot dogs for the second time in 5 years at Venture Family Fun Center. I looked up my last review and realized it was almost five years ago. You can read it here if you are so inclined.

I'm sad to report that nothing has really changed since April of 2006. The hot dogs still have visual and tactile appeal: The slaw looks good, the chili is nicely txtured and clolored and the weight of the dog seems hefty. The bun is soft and nicely steamed.

But put it in your mouth and its mediocrity really comes to life: The onions are old tasting and the weenie seems waterlogged. The chili and slaw don't work together. Just unsatisfying all around.

The worst thing about the visit however was a hanging ten pin that stopped my run at a 200 game in the tenth frame at 196. Not bad, though, for only my 2nd time bowling in 5 years!

Morrison's and Skeenies both make Rachel Ray's Top 64!!!!!!

Thanks to our good friend Hawk Krall and his considerable influence in the food blogging world, two of the most celebrated HDJs in West Virginia have been included in the bracket of 64 best hot dogs in America on the hugely popular Every Day with Rachel Ray website.

OK WVHD fans, let's rally to the aid of our state's finest! Leave your enthusiastic comment on the Rachel Ray site to make sure that we're not overlooked. We have a lot of geography and population to make up for.

http://www.rachaelraymag.com/every-day-living/trip-advice/the-search-for-americas-best-hot-dog

Charleston HDJ Review - Blossom Deli

We first reviewed the hot dog offered by this Charleston landmark eatery in 2007. You can read that review here. Unfortunately, that restaurant closed last year and in its place has popped up a poser with the same name in the same building. This new manifestation has been open for a month or so and I just recently heard that they had resurrected the "Blossom Dog" - a Five Weenie treat in 2007 - and so I had to go try it.

I was somewhat surprised that the place was open on Saturday because they cater mostly to the downtown work crowd, but it was fairly busy today so it was good that they were open. Good for them at least; not so much for a hungry soul who wandered in out of the cold with expectations of being satisfied like I was last time.

You see, the hot dog that the Blossom used to serve was an oversize giant that had a $3.50 price tag, but was worth every penny. When I saw the new version priced at $4.50, I wasn't discouraged; after all it was as big as two or three regular WVHDs and if it was half as yummy as before I would still get filled up.

Unfortunately, though, it was half the size of the old version. While the taste was about as good as before (almost identical as I remember it) this thing was puny! Instead of being an oversize Chicago Red weenie it was a small caliber version of a standard WVHD weenie. Instead of an oversize special made bun it was on a dreaded New England Style bun. The chili and slaw were both tasty and worked well together, but I was still extremely hungry after it was gone. Thankfully I had a plate full of chips and my lunch companion took pity on me and shared her chicken artichoke salad with me so I had enough strength to make it back to the car. A trip to Charleston Bread Company for a couple of hot from the oven cookies brought me all the way back to consciousness.

Once I had regained my senses I decided to write a review so no other WVHD fan will have to make the same mistake. This is about the worst value I have ever experienced in the 400 plus reviews we have done on this blog. Bad, bad, bad form for a once-proud restaurant.

Here's my advice to Blossom about their Blossom Dog - Make it bigger or make it cheaper or make it go away.

No Weenies for you.