Mercer County HDJ Review - Sun Valley Country Store

Since my daughter is a student at UCLA (University of Concord Located in Athens) I frequently travel to the southern part of the state on missions of mercy - usually involving the delivery of vast sums of cash or other valuables. One recent trip found me arriving at just about lunchtime and so my starving daughter and I went looking for a bite to eat. On the road between Athens and Pipestem State Park sits the little wide spot known as "Speedway," and in this wide spot sits Sun Valley Country Store, and inside this country store there is a restaurant.

I was pleased when I saw hot dogs on the menu, but confused when I saw slaw listed as a 10 cent upgrade to the basic dog. I have only run into this price gouging strategy once before (and that was in Huntington where they don't really know what a WVHD is anyway) and I was a little offended by it. I know it's only a dime, but it's the principle of the thing.

So I pays my extra 2o cents and I gets my two hot dogs with slaw. The whole time I am waiting for my order I'm thinking "if you are going to charge me extra - even a dime extra - it had better be worth it." And I'll tell you now that it kind of was: It was sweet, creamy and tasty.

Unfortunately this good slaw sat upon mediocre chili (slightly spicy) and a waterlogged weenie. It was all nestled inside a grilled New England Style bun - a common strategy to hide inferior ingredients.

Overall it was a 3 Weenie hot dog, mostly on the strength of the expensive slaw. Halfway between Hinton (home of the much adored Hinton DQ dog and Kirk's) and the bonafide 5 Weenie dogs at Lynn's in Bluewell, I think if you find yourself in Speedway and hankerin' for a good hot dog you should drive a little further.

Page HDJ - Woods Market

Obviously for most West Virginians, the first question that we have to answer is "where in the @#?! is Page?" The answer to that is easy: Between Montgomery and Oak Hill. The REAL question should be "How in the @#?! did you find this place?" The answer to that questions is that a small email campaign waged by Fayette County readers persuaded me that this little place in this little place that is between two other slightly larger little places just might have a great hot dog. So I had bookmarked it and the first time I found myself in Mongummy at lunch time I decided to hop over Deepwater Mountain and check it out.

As you can see from the picture, from the outside this is not a place that you might expect to find hot dogs, and without the aforementioned letters from readers I am positive that I would have never darkened the doorway of this establishment. Not that it looks terribly scary, it's just that it looks like every small community market I have ever been in and I felt certain that I knew exactly how it would smell inside, and I knew that the people that worked there would recognize that I was not local and watch every move I made in the store - which was exactly what happened when I went in (every time I go into one of these places I feel like the guy working there just might be on the news someday, ala Norman Bates).

But there are some rewards that are worth the risk and the promise of a good WVHD is worth a considerable amount of emotional discomfort, if not bodily harm. I'm not sure that this hot dog, though, was quite worth the risk.

Don't get me wrong, the hot dog was not without merit. My biggest complaint is that the chili was sparsely applied - so sparse that I really couldn't tell much about its taste except that it is heavy on onions. The slaw was finely chopped and wonderful tasting, but also served sparingly. The bun was nicely steamed and overall it was a good Utilitarian Dog, but hardly worth the trip to Page - even from Montgomery.

I'll rate Woods Market's hot dogs at a generous 3.5 Weenies, simply for being an outpost of Weeniedom on the rural Fayette County frontier. If you are in the neighborhood, stop and try it.

Book Review - Hot Dog - A Global History

I recently received an email from a publisher's rep who told me that WVHotDogBlog.com was mentioned in a new book and asked if we would help promote it. He graciously honored my request for a review copy of the book. I found this beautiful November day a perfect day to sit outside and read and since the book is only 144 pages including appendices, it was easy to finish in one sitting. The book is well written and thoroughly researched. There is one sentence in the book about our beloved West Virginia hot dogs and WVHotDogBlog.com is listed as an authority. The author, Bruce Kraig, does a very thorough job at telling his readers esoteric facts about hot dogs, including a very scholarly treatment of hot they came to be called "hot dogs". He also tells us stories that run the gamut from amusing to disgusting about how frankfurters are made and sold. The biggest problem I found with the book is this: He talks about wieners, frankfurters and sausages and calls them "hot dogs." Chapter 2 is entitled "How Hot Dogs Are Made" and he goes into great detail about the manufacturing of frankfurters. He doesn't seem to ever quite disconnect the sausage from the sandwich. You see, a hot dog is a sandwich. It is a sausage placed on bread. The sausage might be called a frankfurter, wiener, sausage or any number of other nicknames, but the meat alone is not a hot dog. Chapter 2 is completely about the meat. Chapter 3 (How Hot Dogs Are Sold) is even more confusing because it seamlessly switches back and forth between taking about how the meat is distributed, marketed and merchandised and then talking about the different kind of hot dog joints. He never makes the distinction between the meat and the sandwich. This is extremely frustrating for us here at WVHotDogBlog.com because we have been trying for years to make people understand the single most important truth about a West Virginia Hot Dog - It is not about the weenie! While I think this might be truer for WVHDs than it is in other regions, I feel certain that the toppings are at least as important for every regional manifestation of the hot dog. I am sure that Kraig knows this, but he never mentions it in his book. But that gripe aside, this book is worth the $10.95 Amazon.com price just for the history lesson it provides. I've included the link so you can order it for yourself.

Smithers HDJ Review - Lopez Family Restaurant

This family owned restaurant has stood alongside Rt. 60 in Smithers for as long as I can remember. It's proximity to The Dairy Carte has prevented me from trying their hot dogs, because why would you pass a perfectly good 4.5 Weenie HDJ to take a risk on a dodgy looking roadside diner?

Recently, though, I was having lunch with someone who didn't want a hot dog (GASP!!!) and so we thought Lopez's was worth a try.

First of all, we need to address the odd fact that Lopez's is first and foremost an Italian restaurant. Odd, I think, because the name might evoke images of torillas and enchiladas, but in this neck of the woods, you see, Lopez is an Italian name. Don't ask me why or how, just accept it.

Secondly, I have to confess that I have no idea what the name of this place actually is. The sign painted on the building says "Lopez and Son Big John Family Restaurant." It makes we wonder who Big John is - whether it is Lopez or Son. The menu just says "Lopez Restaurant"

Well, whatever the actual name, the actual restaurant is an interesting mix of Italian eatery and Applachian roadside diner. They have spaghetti and baked steak on the menu and the place is decorated with dark wood paneling and fake grapevine greenery. Loud, handpainted signs and an oddly placed Pepsi machine completes the unrefined tackiness of the place. Really, this is not the kind of place I would expect to find authentic Italian food in, but my dining companion raved about her dish.

But that's not why I went, now is it?

The Lopez hot dog bears no Italian influence that I could detect. I halfway expected the chili to be sweet, spicy and tomatoey but instead it was meaty and hearty without a hint of any spice other than chili powder. Very typical of Upper Kanawha Valley HDJs. The copious serving of slaw was coarsely chopped but was sweet and somehow creamy in spite of the coarseness. The bun was crusty from being heated in a dry oven: Not my preferred method of warming but it does show an intention that I admire.

Overall the hot dog was tasty and satisfying enough to warrant a 4 Weenie rating. Certainly not the best hot dog in Smithers, but a good effort nevertheless.

Back From the Wilderness

The stench of the latrine filled my nostrils as I approached the camp. With all of the stealth I could muster I crept closer and closer to the sound - and now smells - of the enemy who would immediately assail me if my presence was detected. I realized that I was holding my breath as my senses were on razor's edge; "must breathe normally" I told myself. Through the brush I could see the dimly lit faces that belonged to the people who wanted to cause me harm. It was the first time that I had laid eyes upon their evil flesh, and the sight made my blood run cold and boil at the same time. Here I would wait until they were asleep. Then I would make my move, and what a move it would be.

Silently I made myself comfortable against the base of a tree, not knowing how long I would have to be there. Close enough now to hear their breathing, I would wait until it achieved the measured rhythm of slumber, and then I would wait some more. To keep myself from also falling victim to Morpheus' spell, I began to think of stressful things that would stimulate my adrenal gland into releasing its magic hormone that would keep sleep at bay. I thought about my earlier near death moment, then about the time when I had been tortured to within an inch of oblivion; these two thoughts helped to stay my furor and fuel my will of revenge against these mongrels that lay just on the other side of the bush.

Then I thought of an even more stressful thing: It has been months since I last posted a decent entry on the hot dog blog. This thought became an over arching presence in my brain and I could not escape it. How could I engage in the battle that lay ahead with such a distraction hanging over my head? After a long internal struggle I decided that my nemeses' demise must wait for another day: I had more important things to do. Just as stealthily as I came, I retreated.

I promise, dear readers, this week there will be new reviews and other hot dog stuff posted.

Belle HDJ Review - Mator's Family Grill

Sitting alongside DuPont Avenue just outside the Belle city limits is this little HDJ that seems to want to be a family restaurant but is essentially a sports bar with a family section. The inside, especially the sports bar section, is much nicer looking than is the exterior which is bland cinder block painted with bland colored paint.

I'm taking a complete guess here, but from the look of the decor in the interior of the family section I would imagine that Mator must have played football for the old DuPont High School since the place is covered with photos and memorabilia of people like Corky Griffith, Danny Williams and yes even Randy Moss. "Mator" sounds like an offensive lineman's name, doesn't it?

Hot dogs were listed on the menu and so I inquired as to what constituted "everything" and was predictably told chili, slaw, mustard, onions and ketchup. I say "predictably" because I am developing a new theory about the upper Kanawha Valley and its unexplainable attachment to the red stuff on hot dogs. Not sure why this is, but almost every HDJ between Malden and Montgomery seems to include it. Of course I asked them to hold mine.

The weenie was split and grilled and heavily salted. The chili was a good texture, but way too salty. The slaw was nicely creamy and tasted heavy of celery salt. The New England Style bun was grilled in what I can only imagine was salted butter. I'm not positive that the mustard wasn't salty, but by the time I paid attention to it my salt-sensing taste buds were overloaded.

So what I am trying to say with some subtlety, is that Mator's hot dogs are kind of salty.

I'll generously give Mator's a 3 Weenie score, only because I know that there are people out there who like their food much saltier than do I, and also because they have a picture of an old river tug boat that is named "Stanton".

Labor Day Thanks

On this Labor Day, We at WVHotDogs.com would like to thank all of the folks who work their buns off all across West Virginia to make sure that a great hot dog is never than a few miles or minutes away.

Hat tip to all y'all.

101 Unique Places to Dine in W.Va.

This list was published a few months ago and since then it has definitely increased my desire to go on food road trips around the state. But I quickly found out that some of the places on the list aren't so unique and some might be qualified as "unique" but also are not very good.

Somebody has started a new web site that asks for input on the subject in the form of comments, and you can also complain about who was left off of the list. I would encourage you to head over there and post your thoughts about the places on the list. Your insight might save a fellow diner a lot of gas money.

Also, from that same list, here are the hot dog joints included on it (the numbers and descriptions are from the WV Tourism site and should not be construed as any kind of ranking or official WVHotDogBlog.com commentary):

8. Blues BBQ 1109 Jefferson Rd., South Charleston (304) 744-8335 Blues is famous for its mouth-watering barbecue and ribs, smoked fresh daily right on the premises and served in a casual dining atmosphere. Or, choose from a variety of specialty salads and sandwiches, then top off your meal with a delicious hand-spun milkshake.

10. Burger Carte Rt. 60, Smithers (304) 442-2071 This favorite has been serving up homemade hot dog chili and slaw, hand-patted hamburgers, pretzel dogs, sea dogs, funnel fries and broccoli bites for 40 years.

23. Der Dog Haus 2000 E. Seventh St., Parkersburg (304) 422-7703 Hot dogs, Thursday night ribs, great veggie soup, nightly specials, sandwiches, salads and much more.

32. Fatbob’s Roadhouse Diner4924 MacCorkle Ave. SW (inside Harley-Davidson of WV), South Charleston (304) 768-1600 http://www.wvharley.com/Pull up a seat and enjoy the camaraderie of the employees at Fat Bob’s. They’re sure to make your dining experience fun and enjoyable..

39. Griffith and Feil Soda Fountain 1405 Chestnut St., Kenova(304) 453-4192 Hailing from the western gate of the Mountain State, Griffith and Feil Soda Fountain in Kenova serves a unique blend of fine food and West Virginia history.

45. Hillbilly Hotdogs Lesage, Huntington and Lavalette locations(304) 762-2458 http://www.hillbillyhotdogs.com/Hillbilly Hotdogs is famous for its “Homewrecker” and “The Doublewide.” The unique décor and friendly wait staff make your experience at Hillbilly Hotdogs one you’ll want to come back for.

48. Jim’s Drive In Rt. 60 West, Lewisburg(304) 645-2590 This drive-in restaurant with homemade food and curbside service has been in business for more than 50 years.. This family eatery specializes in mouth-watering barbecue and hot dog chili.

52. King Tut Drive-In301 N. Eisenhower Drive, Beckley (304) 252-6353 http://www.kingtutdrivein.com/You won’t want to miss this Beckley hot spot that was voted one of the “Top 55 Must See Places in WV” in 2004. The mouth-watering menu consists of pizza and sandwiches as well as full dinners – all of which you can either take home or eat right there in the car. Top your meal off with a slice of King Tut’s famous homemade pie.

53. Kirk’s 215 Main St., Hinton (304) 466-4600 If you’re in the mood for traditional pub fare, Kirk’s is the place to be. Kirk’s also offers a full list of imported and domestic beers and wines, as well as pool tables, dart boards and televisions to give you the “full pub experience.”

62. Mayberry’s Restaurant 1481 MacCorkle Ave., St. Albans(304) 722-2660 Step back in time at Mayberry’s Restaurant where you can have the “best Coke floats in town.” The clean, friendly staff will make your visit a happy one.

65. Morrison’s Drive Inn 126 Stolllings Ave., Logan (304) 752-9872 World famous hot dogs, homemade onion rings and a glimpse of curb girl Sally Wall all await you at Morrison’s Drive Inn. Sally’s been serving some of the best hot dogs in the state for almost 60 years and still works a full schedule. Morrison’s earned the designations of “No. 1 Hot Dog Chili” and “No. 1 Hot Dog in the State of WV” in 2007 from http://www.wvhotdogBlog.com/.

71. Pinnacle Drive Inn Pinnacle Avenue and Rt. 16, Pineville(304) 732-7785 This long-established Pineville eatery may be best known for its hoagies and hot dogs. The Pinnacle Drive Inn never ceases to draw first-time visitors as well as its loyal clientele.

84. The Fresh Seafood Company 800 Smith St., Charleston (304) 344-1905 http://www.capitolmarket.net/Capitol Market, an old train station that was converted to a farmers market in downtown Charleston, houses The Fresh Seafood Market. Known for the “big fish sandwich,” The Fresh Seafood Market is a must-visit location for any seafood lover.

89. The Parkette Old Rt. 50/Old Bridgeport Hill Rd., Clarksburg(304) 623-0155 The Parkette has been a Bridgeport/Clarksburg area staple since the 1950s. Enjoy what generations of locals have enjoyed: great Italian and diner food.

97. Top Spot Country Cookin’7139 Sissonville Drive, Sissonville (304) 984-2816 http://www.topspotcountrycookin.com/If country cooking is what you’re looking for, then head to Top Spot in Sissonville. Award-winning chicken and dumplings, meatloaf, baked steak, fried chicken and cornbread are all on the menu. The waitresses are very friendly, courteous and considerate and will accommodate changes in orders without question.

Frequently Asked Questions

While we have an FAQ page over at WVHotDogs.com, here are some that are somewhat frequent as well:


Q. What kind of hot dogs do you think are best?

A. This question is based on the faulty premise that the term "hot dog" means the same thing as "weenie", and is further misguided because a WVHD is not about the weenie.


Q. So if you make hot dogs at home, what kind of weenie do you use.

A. Why on earth would I make a hot dog at home? I can buy a hot dog nearly 24 -7 for about a buck. To buy a package of 10 weenies, 8 buns, ingredients for slaw (or a tub of pre-fab), ingredients for chili (or a tub of pre-fab) would cost a minimum of $10 and then I'd have to labor intensively for an hour or two. And still, I wouldn't have a finished product as good as a basic gas station Utilitarian Dog.


Q. Do you have a good chili/sauce recipe?

A. Not that I can vouch for (see above) but here is a link to one that seems pretty good.

Charleston HDJ Review - Harding's Family Restaurant

Right off of the Mink Shoals exit of I79, about 2 miles north of the Charleston city limit sign, sits this old favorite. Harding's brags about serving breakfast anytime (which prompted me to once ask for French Toast during the Renaissance; they didn't get the joke), has great home style food and is just a gnerally clean and dependable place to eat. It is usually overcrowded after church, but most other times tables are readily available.

Strangely enough, other than on the kid's menu, they have never offered hot dogs. Thankfully that changed recently and I saw an advertisement in the newspaper for a two hot dog lunch special. I wasted no time checking it out.

The special is 2 dogs and fresh cut potato chips for $5.39 - not a great deal, but not too bad for a sit-down place. I inquired as to what they considered to be everything and was horrified to find out that they offered not only ketchup as standard but also relish! Yes, relish! The kind made from pickles! Yecch. I ordered mine without red and green.

The first thing I noticed about my hot dogs upon delivery was that they were served on grilled New England Style buns. The second thing I noticed is that they were messy, really messy. Usually a grilled New England Style bun will hold together pretty well in spite of the volume and water content of the toppings, but these buns weren't up to the task. After the first bite or two they were falling apart and all of the toppings were falling out. The toppings tasted OK, even though the slaw seemed to be eerily similar to the food service slop one usually finds in weaker HDJs. The chili was a little salty and wasn't spicy in the least. The onions were miled, and the mustard was applied on top and in too large of a quantity. Still, the overall taste wasn't bad.

The potato chips were scrumptious, but that can't affect my rating: 3 Weenies.

New Film Project

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Marlinton HDJ - French's Diner

This little corner eatery is the epitome of "nuthin' fancy", and yet it has sat on the same little corner on the same little street in the same little town for 57 years. It has survived the many floods that Marlinton has seen in those years (no doubt that the place has been submerged more than once) and has remained unchanged in the face of a town and county that has seen a complete change in its economy: from timber to tourism to extreme outdoor sports. The fixtures inside the restaurant look to be original from the 1950s and no money looks to have been spent on sprucing the place up in a very long time. Yet, it remains an apparently viable oasis of affordability and simplicity.

So I figured the hot dogs must be awesome.

My first indication that the hot dogs were going to be less than awesome was when I asked what "everything" was and they included ketchup on the list. Of course, I ordered without. Everything else was in order though. I was able to see the entire process or preparing my hot dog from a distance of about 3 feet (I could have easily spit on the grill from the counter) and was surprised to see the bun go down face first on the grill and sizzle in better. You'd expect this with an New England Style bun, but this was a standard model and I think this is the first time I've seen one of those grilled.

The next surprise was that the weenie was plopped into the deep-fryer basket. This isn't out of the question for upstate New York, but certainly not something done often in the Mountain State. The onions where chopped into small cubes and when coupled with the crunchy coleslaw (which was fairly sweet and tasty), the crunchy bun and the crunchy skin on the weenie, it made this one of the crunchiest hot dogs I have ever experienced. It was a nice touch to an otherwise average hot dog.

The only other thing about the dog that bear mentioning is that I am pretty sure that the chili was flavored with ramps. I just barely tasted them, but I'm fairly certain they were in there.

Overall, French's hot dog gets a 3.5 Weenie score.

Ripley HDJ Review - Crabby Patti's

I went to Ripley because of this list and this newspaper article.

When I got there I noticed they had hot dogs.

I got one.

I regretted my decision.

It had beans in the chili.

Any questions?

0.5 Weenies

PS: The crab cakes were mediocre at best. The ones they sell at Fresh Seafood at Capitol Market are much, much better. And their hot dogs are better too.

Weston HDJ Review - T&L Hot Dogs

The T&L Hot Dogs in Weston is one of those infamous off-shoots that isn't included in the canon of the official T&L universe. Like Cindy's T&L in nearby Jane Lew, this branch doesn't seem to have any ties to main chain of stores in the Clarksburg, Morgantown, Bridgeport, or Grafton areas. And like the Jane Lew location, the Weston version has a different take on the original recipe for the chili.

One thing I was quick to discover was that it is possible to possible to overcook or over-spice chili to the point of making it hard to enjoy. I can't put my finger on what it was, but the chili had the taste of being burnt and/or bitter. I had heard tell of overcooked chili, but until today I thought it was just an urban legend. Surely no self-respecting HDJ would sell their chili to consumers if they thought it was sub-par, right? I guess the answer to that is "In some cases, yes." That being said, I can't really comment further on the chili here.

The slaw was a beautiful sight to behold. It had a fantastic appearance, which had managed to hold its form rather well on the account of the loving wrapping job that was done when my order was handed to me (bonus point!). As far as the taste itself, the slaw had a really nice, subtle flavor. There was just enough taste in it to let you know it was there, but not enough to contrast with the rest of the presentation. Thankfully, it also didn't have too much dressing mixed in so as to run off of the hot dog or blend into the chili and make it runny.

I will give T&L in Weston three weenies. I really hope that I just happened to have caught them on an off day as far as the chili goes, but several hours later I can still taste the bitterness when I think about it. The slaw was very good, and I hope they offer it up in take-home containers (if they don't already do so). And as silly as it may seem, the fact that they wrap up the hot dogs so perfectly speaks as to how much care this HDJ is capable of rendering.

Charleston Area HDJ Review - Happy Days Cafe

South Charleston is turning into a real dining destination lately, and even though the best HDJ in town (Romeo's Grill) recently closed down for good, another contender has popped up just around the corner. Happy Days Cafe sits in the same building as the hoity-toity team room restaurant on D Street just a stone's throw from The Mound. It has a 50's theme, with 50's decor on the walls, 50's music in the air and food like you might have found at a soda fountain in the 50's; including hot dogs.

Before I get to the hot dogs, though, let me take just a second to tell you about the popcorn. You see, not since the Scotch Tape Boutique sketch on Saturday Night Live (circa 1980's?) had I heard of a less likely business start up that the specialty popcorn place that opened a few months ago in South Charleston. The place sold popcorn. Period. A whole store devoted to popcorn. They had many different flavors. So, what does this have to do with Happy Days Cafe? The popcorn store owners are the same people that opened Happy Days, and they still have the popcorn business as a kind of kiosk inside the restaurant. The reason I mention it is because the major point of the atmosphere of Happy Days is smoke from the popcorn popper. The ventilation system is ill-equipped to handle it all and the air is thick with oily smoke; and so were my clothes for the rest of the day after I ate there.

But anyway, back to the hot dogs: They are good. They have the right stuff on them, the stuff that's on them is pretty tasty (except for a faint and odd taste that I detected in the cole slaw - like it had been sitting open in the refrigerator beside an open kettle of fish). The chil was salty, but otherwise pretty good. The bun was steamy soft and the weenie was a touch waterlogged. The slaw was beautiful and the onions finely chopped and mild.

I know that from the descriptions there seem to be a lot of negatives, but the hotdogs worked.

Overall, they earned a Four Weenie ranking. With a better weenie, one that hasn't been soaking in a pool of its own filfth (as Chris James likes to say) and fresher coleslaw this could be a 4.5 or even 5. Room for improvement, and I'll be back to see if they do.

We seldom do this...

But honestly, this graphic is worth every bit of the traffic we can send to to Serious Eats. For his foray into the WVHD world, the author ate at Marties, which is the northernmost 5 Weenie HDJ ever reviewed by WVHotDogs.com.

I don't like the huge "slaw dog" label because everyone knows that in West Virginia you don't ask for a "slaw dog" - you just get one; but the graphic is awesome otherwise.

A lot of the content in this article is directly from this blog or the WVHotDogs.com and scant attribution is in evidence, but I am ready to forgive that if they will let me use this graphic.

Weston HDJ Review - Coke & Float

Just outside of Weston sits a humble looking establishment with lists of ice cream goodies so long, they nearly cover the majority of the outer walls near the order window. Coke & Float has just about every imaginable variety of ice cream combination you can imagine (shakes, cones, sundaes, etc.). The hot dogs here are more in the "just alright" arena, meaning they're okay if you need a fix, but whether or not they satisfy a WVHD connoisseur is all a matter of interpretation.

For starters, the weenies used here are rather scrawny. Most likely these

are the bulk variety from somewhere like Sam's Club. On the plus side, it wasn't waterlogged or undercooked. The slaw and onions were both shredded extra-fine, almost to a fault. In my particular hot dog, I found the slaw itself was rather sparse. The little bit that I did manage to separate from the rest of the dog had an good flavor, but with little counter-balance for the notable sweetness.

The chili was likewise very sweet. In fact, I would almost be willing to bet that some form of canned spaghetti sauce was used. That may not be the total gospel, but it tasted very similar to a version made by a relative of mine who does, in fact, use said canned spaghetti sauce.

Still, I've got to hand it to Coke & Float that they do actually care about the hot dogs they make. They come wrapped in wax paper versus the dreaded styro-coffin that seems to be the norm at such stands. Second, and more importantly, you are hard pressed to find many ice cream stands selling hot dogs in the area that actually do have slaw available. My only gripe about the slaw is that there isn't enough. All in all, Coke & Float gets a three weenie rating. Some tweaking of the sauce and extra slaw may be all they need to give their dogs that little extra lift.

2009 Weenie Awards - W.Va.'s Best Hot Dog

After foiling a major ballot box stuffing attempt by a small but noisy group of Fairmont emailers, WVHotDogs.com is finally able to confirm that this year's Weenie Award for the State's Best Hot Dog Joint goes to....................................




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Morrison's Drive Inn in Logan

The mere fact that we get more email from outside the state about this hot dog jont should be enough to cement its place in the WVHotDogs.com Hall of Fame. Even more impressive is that Morrisons isn't on the way to anyplace for most of the state's population, and it is still revered far and wide. The other HDJ that garnered a lot of votes is revered in Fairmont, and by people who used to live in Fairmont.

Congratulations Morrisons, for winning your second Weenie Award!

2009 Weenie Awards - North Central Region Winners

The 2009 North Central Region winners for the Weenie Awards contains some returning faves and a couple of new entries, including a new winner for in the Best Overall.

Without further adieu:

Marion County - Hank's Deli, Fairmont
Marion County has improved by substantial leaps and bounds in shedding the stigma of being a "no slaw" zone. The crew at Hank's never paid attention to this fictional "rule" anyway. The result? Once again, some of the best WVHDs around.

Lewis County - Cindy's T&L Hot Dogs, Jane Lew
In the past year, Lewis County was added to the areas we reviewed, and Cindy's was the hand-down winner right off the bat. The service is terrific, and the dogs are worth making the quick jaunt off of Exit 105 of I-79 for.

Taylor County - Hometown Hot Dogs, Grafton
Too easy. The competition was minimal, at best. Beyond that, Hometown knows the value of consistency when it comes to a quality WVHD.

Wetzel County - Presto Lunch, New Martinsville
Wetzel County is also a new area for this past year. Focusing primarily on downtown New Martinsville proved to be enough of a challenge due to the quality of contenders, but Presto Lunch easily bested them all. The TLC they put into their entire menu is beyond description.

Harrison County - T&L Hot Dogs, Old Bridgeport Hill, Clarksburg
Although there are a couple of new contenders ready to emerge in Clarksburg in the near future, the Old Bridgeport Hill location of T&L Hot Dogs continues to be the superior outlet for WVHDs in the area, as well as in the T&L chain.

Monongahelia County - Haught Diggity Dogz, Morgantown
Morgantown remains a tough area to review since there are way more HDJs in the city than can be found via a singular internet search. Still, of those that have been reviewed nobody was able to top the homestyle goodness coming from Haught's. This is the second year for Haught Diggity Dogz to take the top title in Mon County, but they do not repeat as the Best Overall for the region.

And the winner for Best Overall North Central Region - Hot Dog Hut, Philippi
Hot Dog Hut was a late addition during last year's awards and unfortunately didn't make the cut for consideration. A re-review of this fine establishment turned out to be one of the highlights of my travels for wonk. Angie and her team have mastered the fundamentals of having a great "all-around" package when it comes to value for the dollar, quality ingredients and preparation, and service. Well done and congratulations to Hot Dog Hut!

W.Va.'s Best HDJ? The Polls are Open

Due to severe budget cutbacks at WVHotDogs.com, we have had to restrict the far-flung tasting junkets of our Weenie Wonks. Their loss is your gain: We have decided to allow our reader's voices to be heard in an unprecedented way as we open this important questions to the whims and prejudices of our readership.

You may post your vote for the state's best hot dog joint as a comment or email it to info@wvhotdogs.com

Polls will be open through midnight on July 31 and results will be posted Monday, August 3.

May the best dog win.

2009 Weenie Awards - Charleston Area Winners

For the second year running, Swiftwater Cafe takes the prize for Best Downtown Hot Dog Joint in Charleston. The decision wasn't as easy this year, since a couple of new discoveries were making some serious challenges to Swiftwater's Genteel Dog offering. Honorable mention goes to The Blue Moon Cafe.

The main reason that Swiftwater was able to hold on to the trophy this year was because of their decision to officially remove ketchup from their list of standard toppings; proving that listening to us and responding to our suggestions pays big dividends. Congratulations, Teddy and crew, on the beginnings of a dynasty.

Outside the confines of the concrete jungle, there is still one place to go for the best hot dog within a short drive of the Capitol dome and that is Skeenies Hot Dogs on Sissonville Drive. After all these years they are still making awesome tasting hot dogs and stuffing them into wax paper sleeves for the eager hoards that await them every day at lunch and dinner times. The truest of the true Utilitarian Dogs has no equal in all of Charleston or Kanawha County. This is also the second straight year for Skeenie's to take the top prize in their category.

Next Up: The State's Best Hot Dog Joint?

Huntington Hot Dog Festival

Once again Huntington tried to play host to the West Virginia Hot Dog Festival. This year's event featured 9 hot dog joints, one wiener manufacturer and a whole bunch of various and sundry vendors, clubs, political action organizations and just general hawkers of meaningless crap.

Here are a few pictures:


This is the "Healthy Alternative" sold by Java Joint. It is a tofu weenie and served with vegetarian chili, er I mean sauce. It tasted like a vegetarian hot dog with about three times more mayonnaise than necessary in the slaw. But at least it had slaw: Many of the other HDJs didn't offer it at all.

I was pleased as punch to see at least one person who sported a WVHotDogs.com t-shirt!


At about 2:30 a huge storm blew up and really put a damper on festivities. Many of the vendors packed it in after this.

The HDJs present were (in no particular order):

Hillbilly Hot Dogs
Java Joint
Stewarts Original Hot Dogs (two stands - I guess when your owner is the festival chairman you get such special treatment)
Cowboy BBQ
Big Loafer
Ramona's Market (From Proctorville, Ohio, for Pete's sake!)
Johnny Dogs
Sam's Hot Dog Stand
Midway Drive In

Other vendors/hawkers/propagandizers included:

Rick's Lemonade - 2 stands
Tri State Casino and Racetrack
Ohio Valley Camera Club
Animal Rescue
Temporry Airbrush Tatoos
Club Pet & numerous other pet related tents)
Avon
Huntington Harmonica Club
ChiroOne.net
Right to Life (complete with a creepy dead baby display)
Colonial Lanes
Sponge Bob Paraphanalia
Hospice of Huntington

I'll say again what I have said for the past 3 years: Call it what you will, this is not a West Virginia Hot Dog Festival, but a Tri-State Hot Dog Festival. The hot dog vendors at this event in no way represent the hot dog culture of the state, and therefore I will waste no more of Blogger's data storage space with more words about it.

For our posts about past years festivals, follow this link.

2009 Weenie Awards: Huntington Area Hot Dog Joint of the Year

While Big Daddy in still recovering from el dio de los perros and Stanton is fighting a Kazakhstani spambot (apparently the blog "iss very nice" and Stanton should sign up for DirecTV through them), I'll go ahead and pull the trigger on the first award of the 2009 Weenie Award season for best HDJ in the Huntington area:

Sam's Hot Dog Stand of 8th Street.

If you want to get the same great utilitarian dog on January 23rd or July 23rd, this is the place to go. Consistency counts, especially when it is consistently great.

Day of the Dog

On July 18th downtown Clarksburg played host to the first annual "Day of the Dog", which was a fund raising event to benefit the Harrison County Humane Society. The event was sponsored by local radio stations and Heiner’s Bakery. For $5.00, you got three tickets and a ballot with which you could vote for your favorite hot dog. There were contests for root beer chugging and, or course, hot dog eating.

This was the first year for the event. Based on the sparse turnout early in the event, I assume that it wasn't advertised all that well I only found out about it a few weeks ago from a friend of mine who happens to listen to one of the sponsoring stations. On top of that, the Glen Elk Wine, Music, and Arts Festival was being held just a few blocks away, probably contributing to the low amount of spectators (at least during the time I was there). Still, those who turned out really seemed to enjoy themselves. There were five competing hot dog vendors. Hank's Deli from Fairmont and Hot Dog Hut from Philippi, both of whom are previous 5-weenie winners were on hand. Clarksburg newcomer and lone cart representative Scooter Dawgs definitely impressed me. The other two entries, both from Clarksburg, were the 4th Street Grill, and June Bugs restaurant.

I figured I'd start off with something familiar to serve as a benchmark and had a sampling of both Hank's and Hot Dog Hut's offerings. No surprises here. Both of them bought their A-game. If you've read their reviews before, or perhaps partaken of their goodness yourself, you know how they can bring it.

I made my rounds with the newcomers starting with Scooter Dawgs. I have to remark that Scooter Dawgs seemed to be playing a high stakes poker game of taste with the other vendors. This was the first time I've had one of their dogs, and it was something to behold. They could've used the standard weenies since this was a fund raising event and all proceeds went to charity. But not in this case. They used a 1/4 all-beef frank that made each bite a meal in itself. The chili was off the charts. By far on par with --if not slightly better than-- Hank's and Hot Dog Hut. The menu wins the award for the most creative

I've ever seen. Anytime you can include peanut butter, raisins, 1000 Island dressing, wasabi, or Japanese hot sauce in a hot dog, you've GOT to know what you're doing. There will be a more in-depth review coming in the very near future. By the way, they did a great job picking out the name for their version of the WV hot dog: The West "By Gawd" Dog.

4th Street Grill offered a more "artisan" hot dog (see Stanton's terrific project covering the classification of the different dogs at this link). They offered up a "blackened" (their words, not mine) all-beef weenie with a pico de gallo and avacado sauce on a fresh Italian bun. It's the

unwritten policy of the WVHotDog.com crew to limit our reviews to the traditional WV hot dog (slaw, chili, onions, mustard), but once in a while we have to deviate from our mission to keep things fresh. Well, not really. I just wanted to try this. I have to confess that this was a really good take on the hot dog, and I'd certainly consider getting another one in the future just for something different. Good flavor and fun to eat.

The final new entry was June Bugs. They had what was easily to best homemade flavor in their slaw. I wouldn't say they were having a good day with the chili how ever. I detected a heavy presence of spices and seasonings typically found in taco meat. Still, I enjoyed the friendliness of

the June Bugs crew. They seemed eager to get their product out as much as possible, so you've got to give them points for enthusiasm. Plus, they were giving away free keychains. What can I say? Freebies rock.

All in all, the whole thing went towards helping a good, worthwhile cause. I hope they give it another go next year with some more publicity beforehand. Likewise, I hope they are able to get some other vendors from around the state to participate. (Custard Stand, Haught's...I'm looking at you!)

By the way, I cast my two votes. One for Hot Dog Hut, one for Scooter Dawgs.

Flatwoods HDJ Review - Custard Stand

I had been reminded that I was far behind on conducting a review for the blog, so I was eager to get on the road for an impromptu business trip to Flatwoods. I had recently heard that the Cowger family had opened a new shop just off exit 67 of I-79. It stands to reason the convenient location will serve this franchise well in the future. Ironically, the restaurant is located in what was briefly a Sam's Hot Dog Stand.

The interior is small, with enough seating for about 16 or 17 people. The outside features a covered patio area with a walk-up window. Custard Stand has a lot of variety on their menu, including several sandwiches, funnel cakes, ice cream treats, broccoli n' cheese poppers (!), chicken, fish, and something I would never expect to find at a hot dog joint...Buzz buttered steak. Very interesting. They also have prepackaged containers of their famous chili available for

purchase. You can get small, one-pound containers, or industrial sized five-pounders. This was also one of the few places that offers a chili dog...without the wiener.

Good service here. I got the eye contact, thank yous, quick prep and delivery of my meal, etc. As I've said time and time again, good service is key to making your HDJ worth coming back to.

When I got my order back to my car, I was pleased as punch to

see that they didn't just wrap it up and toss it in a bag, like I've suffered with before. They carefully balanced the toppings around the weenie, placed it in a paper boat, and delicately wrapped it in wax paper (bonus points) so as not to crush it. When I unwrapped this little hand-held treasure trove, there was a waft of the freshly steamed bun that immediately let me know I was in for a treat.

Indeed, in the first bite I was impressed by how fresh and perfectly steamed the bun was. I took a look at the slaw and found that it was shredded extra fine. Fortunately, it was not doused in too much dressing so as to make the bun soggy. The slaw didn't suffer from an overdose of sweet or sour. It had the "just right" balance that made the perfect compliment to the dog.

I've had Custard Stand chili before, having picked some up at a local grocery store. My take on it is that is truly a southern West Virginia formula, favoring a good simmered beef flavor versus diverse spices, which are more typical of the

northern formulas. There was a nice texture to the beef and just the right amount of sauce mixed in. Like the slaw, it doesn't go overboard in the liquid department, but emphasizes a nice, flowing consistency throughout the whole mixture. I found the whole concoction to be both savory and satisfying.

If I were forced (and I would have to be forced) to point out any flaw, it would only be that it was a little heavy on the mustard for my taste. Still, this was easy to overlook as it melded nicely with the chili. The onions were diced a little coarse as well, but again they only served to compliment the whole package.

I give Custard Stand five weenies. It seems as though the Cowger's have the art of the hot dog down to a science. The chili they serve has captured the essence of what homemade should taste like. In the future, a visit to the original Custard Stand in Webster Springs will be in order.

Happy July 4th!

Here's to Joey Chestnut for his third straight Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest title. 68 hot dogs in 10 minutes! It was an amazing performance; I hope you all got to see it.

In honor of Chestnut's achievement, and on the subject of eating a lot of hot dogs, here is a dramatic portrayal of my last medical check up:

It's July and you know what that means...

Yes indeedy it's time for the 2009 Weenie Awards! Soon our wayward Weenie Wonks will be returning from their far-flung travels into the field and documenting for you, the West Virginia hot dog munching public, where the best WVHDs can be found throughout this wonderful land.

The competition is expected to be brutal this year, but there are some HDJs who are taking it seriously. For example, Swiftwater Cafe in Charleston has changed their definition of "everything" to more closely align with the accepted standard. They used to always include ketchup, but now...

...they have stricken the red stuff from their menu in hopes that we will see that they are serious about their committment. Will their efforts pay off? Will they win the Weenie Award for the best hot dog in downtown Charleston for the second year in a row? Stay tuned and find out.

Building A Great WV Hot Dog At Home: The Import Edition

While I like my homemade WV weenies to be as local as possible, in the name of fairness I figured that I'd let some out-of-state products (or at least stuff from unfamiliar Yankee regions of West-by-God) take a crack at making a good dog.

Rather than my usual Heiner's goodness, I had Pepperidge Farms buns I scored for free with my weenie purchase. Their okay out of the bag for any other part of the country, but the phrase "Huntington-fresh buns" ain't just whistling Dixie. If a dog is to be served here, the bun has to be softer than a Steelers' fan's brain to cut the mustard.

The weenies should be top notch, though. They are the new angus beef franks from Ball Park. I could kill too birds with one stone here. So, as I boiled the weenies, I used some sort of contraption to steam the buns to 'til they had the texture of congealed porridge.

With the sausage and bread under control, next it was time for a squirt of yellow mustard and some sauce. This time I am using some of T & L's spicy sauce that a family member brought me from Clarksburg.

Then it's some Vidalia onions from Georgia and Gunnoe's slaw from East Virginia. Don't forget some salt and pepper, too.

Overall, this one worked out pretty well. The bun was gooey as all get out of it and the angus Ball Park frank is a serious hot dog for a serious weenie wonk. Nathan's skinless franks, at $1.00 more and 65% of the deliciousness, seriously need to justify their existence with a price cut or a pink meat reformulation. I'm still gonna stick to Cavalier freshness for day-to-day dogs, but I might grab some of these angus franks every other payday as a treat.

The T&L sauce was just too damn spicy for my liking. It needed a bit more Italian-y sweetness to balance the flamethrower. That said, I imagine that I will enjoy some of their medium sauce the next time that I am north of Exit 57.

Gunnoe's slaw blows. Bring us back Ballard's, Kroger, even if a few people got sick a few years ago.

Vidalia onions rawk. 'Nuff said.

I give this version 3 weenies, thanks mostly to the weenie, the onions, and to the steaming contraption. A little better and/or a little less spicy sauce and some mediocre slaw could have brought it to the 4 weenie range. Maybe next time.

Hot Dog Classification Project Part IV: So What?

In no order at all, here are some of my observations and comparisons of Utilitarian Dogs, Genteel Dogs and Artisan Dogs. Feel free to add your own observations via comments:

- Utilitarian Dogs have a wide price range from location to location. In North Central WV, these dogs are under a dollar in most HDJs, while in Southern WV they are often $1.50 or more. Predictably enough, Genteel Dogs are less likely to be found in places that have higher priced UDs.

- Overall, hot dogs get more expensive from North to South except for Artisan Dogs.

- HDJs that sell their chili/sauce by the jar always serve UDs.

- UDs will leave a lingering aroma inside your car far longer than either GDs or ADs.

- 75% of Utilitarian Dogs we review score 3.5 Weenies or higher. That number goes down to 50% with Genteel Dogs, while Artisan Dogs score that high only 30% of the time.

- Despite the above statistic, UDs are more likely than the other two classes to score one Weenie or less.

- ADs are far more common in restaurants that are owned by a non-native West Virginians.

- The smaller the parking lot the higher the likelihood that the HDJ sells UDs.

- Urban HDJs are dominated by GDs.

- If there is any seafood other than fried fish on the menu, there will be no UDs.

- HDJs that claim "Best Hot Dogs in Town" usually have UDs. Those that make the claim and have GDs are always lying.

- Ketchup is far more likely to be served on a GD than the other two classes.

- You never see anyone eating an AD wearing a "wife beater" t-shirt, but you will often see a man in a shirt and tie wolfing down a UD.

- Sometimes a HDJ can have a GD for inside dining, but UDs to go.

- Places that are owned by, or cater to, granola crunching liberal hippies are more likely to have ADs. Furthermore, these places are likely to have things like "Free Range Weenies", "Fair Trade Mustard" or "Amish Cole Slaw."

Hot Dog Classification Project Part III: Artisan Dogs

While certainly a minority in the WVHD world, our discussion of hot dog classes can't overlook the hoity-toitiest of the species. These hot dogs are the blue bloods, the aristocracy, the upper crust; or at least that's what they want to be.

I call this class "Artisan Dogs" even though many restaurants (notice I didn't say "Hot Dog Joints" - it just isn't fitting) call this kind of hot dog "gourmet" I refrain from labeling them that way because the word "gourmet" is a word most often used to communicate exceptional quality and these dogs often do not deliver in that regard.

Artisan Dogs, for the most part, bear no resemblance to what most purists think of when they have a craving for a WVHD. Instead of making something great of cheap ingredients, Artisan Dogs take expensive ingredients and try to make something novel. Once in a while it works, but more often it is just an expensive disappointment: ADs are often priced at more than $3 a pop vs. the typical $1.25 for a UD and maybe $1.50 for a GD.

First, an Artisan Dog must have a bun that is different from the norm: Hoagie buns dusted with corn meal are at the low-end with handcrafted artisan rolls (thus the name for this class) at the high end. The weenie is usually large caliber, grilled or flame broiled and sometimes tastes more like sausage than frankfurter. Yellow mustard is rarely found on an Artisan Dog; Brown mustard or even Dijon are commonly used. Then, some kind of chili is applied (usually) and if there is slaw (not a given in this class) it is usually more coarse and more colorful than typical WVHD slaw. Toppings are usually piled so high as to be overflowing the bun.

Now on the surface it might seem a fine line that exists between "Genteel Dogs" and "Artisan Dogs" but not so: GDs are intended to be eaten, while ADs seem to want to be only looked at and admired. Sometimes the large bun, weenie and copious amounts of toppings make the things difficult to eat like a regular hot dog unless your mouth is roughly the size and shape of a Pit Bull's.

A few examples of good tasting Artisan Dogs from the archives of WVHotDogs.com are Tamarack and The Blossom in Charleston. Two others that deserve mention despite their lack of resemblance to a real WVHD are Barnyard in Buckhannon and Delish (now a distant memory because of a fire several years ago) in Charleston. All of these hot dogs were tasty and satisfying, but most of the others we've tried have been lackluster. Some were so disappointing that the reviews were never posted lest we lead our readers to them by mistake.

So, there you have it, three classes of WVHDs that are distinctly different and easily identifiable. In a future post I will crunch the data and make some comparative observations that are interesting to me and hopefully will be to you.

Hot Dog Classification Project Part II: Genteel Dogs

Genteel (jen-teel' )- adjective - 1. Striving to convey a manner or appearance of refinement and respectability. Genteel Dogs are the second, and perhaps the most prevalent class of hot dogs sold at West Virginia HDJs. The above definition of "genteel" (courtesy of Dictionary.com) really hits the nail on the head when it comes to these hot dogs and the motivation behind them. They are neater in appearance than Utilitarian Dogs and most times there is some thought given to the presentation even if they are served in a coffin (which is almost always how they are packaged to go since the coffin protects them from being misshapen by handling during delivery). As you might suspect, sometimes all of this effort to make the hot dog appear more respectable is really just an attempt at covering up one that has been made with less than respectable ingredients. I am sure that I speak for the other Weenie Wonks when I say that some of the most carefully assembled and presented hot dogs were also some of the most bland tasting dogs we've had the misfortune of reviewing. But sometimes the opposite is true: The HDJ has a good tasting product and want to give it the presentation that it deserves. Presentation aside, Genteel Dogs dogs are also likely to have perceived upgrades in the weenies, buns and onions to further give the "appearance of refinement and respectability." All Beef weenies are regularly offered in this class, as are over-sized large caliber weenies of unknown content that are simply identified as "premium." Some of these are truly an upgrade and some are just bigger. Say what you will but when it comes to hot dog weenies, it's not the size that counts: Bigger is not better. Buns, likewise, are open for negotiation for Genteel Dogs. Good ol' Heiners standard buns are often eschewed in favor of one that is a crustier, larger or dusted with some kind of grain. New England Style buns, grilled or toasted, reside exclusively in this class. If standard buns are used, great care is taken to ensure that it retains its shape so steaming is out of the question. Onions are unpredictable in this class. They might be sweet, hot, yellow, white, red or Vidalias, but the one constant is that they are chopped in larger chunks in this class than you will usually find on Utilitarian Dogs. Interestingly enough, slaw is one topping that varies little from the kind you might find on Utliltarian Dogs, except that it is usually applied with more care. And mustard is mustard unless the HDJ takes the pretense up a notch and uses Dijon; an offense that should be punishable by law (and that usually only happens in the third and final class of WVHDs that will be discussed in a future post).

Since I have already admitted my preference for Utilitarian Dogs, I will further confess that I rarely find Genteel Dogs to be as satisfying. The most obvious exception for me would be Swiftwater Cafe in Charleston, whose dogs are definitely Genteel. Swiftwater's weenie is larger and beefier than most. The chili is pretty tasty and the slaw is terrific. The bun isn't steamed and they take great care in placing the toppings without squashing down the bulk. Which leads me to another point on the Genteel Dog: One has to open one's mouth much wider for a GD than a UD. For some this is a problem. Please keep your off-color sexist comments to yourselves.

Genteel Dogs can be found at diners like Red Line Diner in St. Albans or DJ's in Fairmont, and most sit-down restaurants that sell hot dogs other than those on the kid's menu.

Next up: Artisan Dogs

Kingdom, Phylum, Class, Order, Family, Genus, Species

While not exactly snowflake-like, it isn't often that you find perfectly similar West Virginia hot dogs at two HDJs. Just the variation in the spiciness of the chili and the sweetness of the slaw ensures a wide variety of kind of hot dogs you might find at any given HDJ, but when you add in the wild cards of onions, weenies and buns you have a multitude of possible combinations. While this blog is dedicated to exposing all of these different varieties, it sometimes is necessary to consolidate and classify the major divisions in order to better serve the hot dog eating public.

The reason it's necessary is that there are different strokes for different folks. People are forever asking me "where is the best hot dog?" and that's really hard to answer accurately unless I qualify the answer with a description of these three major divisions of hot dogs.

I've kicked this task around for the past couple of years and put it on the back burner for far too long. What has prevented me from blogging this is not the actual classification; that's pretty easy. I am completely comfortable saying that there are three basic kinds of hot dogs sold by HDJs in the state, and I know exactly what makes them different. What gives me pause is the names for the groups. It's hard to come up with adequate names for each of the classes that are descriptive, succinct and amusing. And so I will be seeking your advice, gentle reader, on names for these classes of hot dogs. You can leave them as comments or email them to me. I will be using working names for the purposes of these posts. I say "these posts" because each will be too long for one post. This first post will include the first of the categories and the others will come later in the week.

The First Category - "The Utilitarian Dog"

This is actually the one working name I feel good about. Hot dogs in this class are usually served at dairy bars and other such joints that feature fast service and inexpensive dogs. They are usually stuffed into a wax paper sleeve or wrapped up in cellophane with no thought at all given to presentation. They are for the purpose of tasting great and filling up your belly fast. Period. HDJs that advertise 10 hot dogs for 10 dollars or some such mass quantity discount are nearly always selling Utilitarian Dogs. Think "sack full of hot dogs."

I have to admit, the Utilitarian Dog is my favorite of the three classes that we will discuss. When my mouth waters for a hot dog, I usually am fantasizing about a Skeenie's dog stuffed into the wax paper sleeve with their logo on it, or perhaps a Morrison's hot dog with all of the toppings smushed up against the cellophane so I can get a glimpse of the goodness before I even smell it. Both of these hot dogs reside in the UD class.

Utilitarian Dogs are usually soft to the touch and have sufficient heft to make them mold to your hand when you first lift it to your mouth. The reason for this softness is usually a bun that has been steamed before the toppings were applied, but the softness sometimes is just because the hot toppings steam the bun inside the impervious wrapping; I don't think it matters which, even though I do love the attention to detail that a bun steamer communicates. And whatever the reason for the softness, UDs are usually sloppy and if you try to eat one while driving you will be wearing a portion of it all afternoon.

Another distinguishing feature of the UD is the aroma: Typically hot dogs joints that serve UDs have huge pots of chili that sit and simmer all day long and therefore have the wonderful aroma of slow cooked goodness, and since the onions are chopped well in advance (necessary for fast delivery to hordes of hungry customers) they have a tendency to be strong and aromatic.

While people who prefer Utilitarian Dogs can probably find a modicum of happiness in hot dogs of the other two classes yet to be discussed, they aren't likely to fall in love with them. On the other hand, people who like the other classes aren't likely to find anything redeeming about a Utilitarian Dog; it is completely unpretentious, unkempt and unlike the other two, is built only for pleasing the palate.

Of course, there are plenty of hot dogs in the UD class that do not please the palate. And frankly, a bad UD is probably worse than a bad dog of the other classes. Most of the hot dogs I've bought to review and then thrown away after one or two bites have been UDs. I'll reveal my thoughts on why I think this is so when we talk about the other dogs, but suffice it to say that some UD HDJs are only about the bulk, price and speed that they think their impatient customers want. Thankfully there are many who recognize that good taste is equally important. A few of these are the aforementioned Skeenie's and Morrison's, but also worthy of mention are Clendenin Dairy Queen, Kenny's in West Hamlin, The Spot in Flatwoods and Sam's Hot Dog Stands.

Next time: Genteel Dogs

Charleston HDJ Review - The Dome

Enough was enough: I had to intervene to help fallen (or at least falling) comrades from their wandering in the desert. You see, ever since the last joint review we did with the folks from Fork You they have been all over the map, literally and figuratively, reviewing chain restaurants like Hardees, White Castle, Captain D's, etc. This in spite of a blog identity statement that claims to review "local Charleston WV restauarants." An intervention was in order and so I set up a meeting.


I had actually reviewed this place before, but then it was called "Gold Dome BBQ" and was very smoky. It's now called "The Dome" and since the glorious Kanawha County smoking ban took effect, it means I could go back and try the onion rings without a side order of second hand smoke.


My previous review was so old that it pre-dated the weenie rating system, but I remembered that the hot dogs were very good. So I ordered two without fear and an order of the onion rings that I remember seeing when I was last there.


While we waited on our order, I lectured my young and less experienced food bloggers on the evils of chains and the necessity of staying focused. Thankfully, our food took a looong time to arrive so I had plenty of time to get my point across. I think you will see better behavior from them from now on.


When our food did arrive, lecture time was over and eatin' time began. I was very impressed with the taste, texture and volume of the slaw on top of the hot dogs. The chili had the beautiful dark brown color that usually means a rich, complex flavor; and one taste proved it to be so. The only thing missing was any trace of spiciness. It definitely need some more chili powder or maybe a little cayenne to bring it to life. The bun was nicely steamed, but the weenie was a tad waterlogged.


The onion rings did turn out to be pretty good, but that's beside the point. The hot dogs at the Dome get a 4 Weenie rank. You can check out the Fork You review of their orders here.

The Homewrecker from Hillbilly Hot Dogs

Here is a video of a guy named Sean eating the Homewrecker from HillBilly Hot Dogs. That's a 3.5 lbs dawg featuring a 1 lb weenie topped with sauteed peppers n onion, two kinds of cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, jalapenos, spicy sauce, mustard, ketchup (ew, but I digress), and slaw. If you eat it all in 12 minutes, you get a t-shirt and braggin' right.



My arteries hurt just watching that.