Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Stop Hot Dog Reform Now!!!

Yesterday NPR reported that some fat cats at a so-called "scientific" organization called the "American Academy of Pediatrics" is calling for a redesign of weenies to prevent children from accidentally choking on hot dogs.

Let's be honest. The debate on this topic is far from settled. The children choking is likely part of a natural process that has been going on for thousands of years and not the result of man-made sausages.

Let's not forget that this hot dog redesign will be a job killer. We shouldn't let these child-hugging extremists take away American jobs. Granted, many of these meat packers are immigrants, but no one gets worked up about that anymore, so we'll stick to what is convenient.

Here are some random links to pictures of old veterans and some guy hunting.

We need to make a stand against socialized hot dog design. Hot dog patties are simply not what our Deist Founding Fathers intended.

If you are a Real American, you will join us in taking a stand against Obamadogs. We can't let the welfare of future generations get in the way sticking it to some eggheads with fancy degrees.

We're Dogged Enough Already.


Christopher Scott Jones said...

On a serious note, I cut hot dogs into lengthwise quarters when I give them to my young sons for this exact reason.

The Film Geek said...

Friends of Whole Wieners.

We could even have a football game played in its honor.

Stanton said...

Well said, Chris!

They can have my hot dog when they pry it out of my cold, dead fingers.

Unknown said...

I totally agree! As an expectant mom, I'm all about my child's safety but changing the shape of the hot dog takes things way too far! In fact, I wrote a blog post about this very topic yesterday: http://141characters.wordpress.com/2010/02/24/safety-schmafety/

Yank's Franks said...

No matter what the food. Whether it is on the list of choking hazards or not, parents please always watch your children while they are eating. Never leave them alone while eating. If they are choking, they can not make noise. And, they can choke on almost anything.